the cruel & heartless fate of time travel
It’s no exaggeration when saying upon leaving the hospital a year ago I was saddled with somewhere between 13 and 17 daily drugs. This wrinkles me because I don’t believe that at the slightest inclination something may be slightly wrong that you instantly run for prescription pills. I have been on one prescription or another for my hypothyroidism issues for 40 years. One daily pill is enough. 13 is a nightmare (When I was on Obamacare my drugs are paid for. Now that I’m on Medicaid my prescriptions are $4. If I have to take 13 drugs a month....I cannot do math like that in my head).
Besides the monetary issue is the side effects issue which I have spoken about previously. That brings us to where we are now. One of the weirdest side effects is my propensity to sit on the side of the bed. I sleep on the left side of the bed and two or three times a night I wake up and find myself perc with my legs on the floor my ass on the bed. Every once in a while I will wake up while trying to prop myself up in. We switched up the drugs a couple weeks ago and I went a few days without his behavior. Unfortunately it didn’t last long enough. We dropped another drug, replaced one or something, I’m not sure, and now I’m back to it.
Yeah? So what?
The first day I was out of the hospital and back home, I fell off the bed. It was the bad math of silk shorts on a silk comforter that slid me off. Forward to New Year’s 2025 and I had no further tumbles. The first week of January I fell off and then again about 10 days ago. One of those times I had dreamt I was trying to skate. Oh my how my dreams convinced me it was real so I attempted standing but only succeeded in falling. Poor Erica was there both times as I assured her these were anomalies. Things went back to normal until last night.
Again if by some dark spirit I found myself sitting on the edge of the bed. In my dream state I dropped several things on the ground. In real life I’ve been going to pick it up and as you would expect...ain't nothing there. In another dream I was kneeling down petting some adorable puppies. Later I was propped up at the edge of the bed (both in the real & dream state). While dreaming I stood up off the picnic table where I weas petting the pups. Stupidly I tried to do the same in the real world. My hips got off my bed but the weight of my bulbous head plugged me directly to the floor. Crack! The sound of my skull hitting the carpet freaked Erica and I awake.
'Man alive', I thought 'I have really fucked myself up this time'. I grabbed my forehead and it was wet but it was not blood. Erica did what Erica do. She freaked out and ran in circles . I try to take account of my faculties and everything was fine. Erica’s took a few minutes freaking before comforting me . She left to get a washcloth so i decided to try & get back on the bed. I push myself up with both hands and made it to Kneeling position, left leg up right knee kneeling (thinks Colin Kapernick) position. I push down on the bed with all my might and was able tom force my left my right leg under me. I pushed as hard as I could and for the first time since August of last year, found myself sstanding up kinda. My legs are straight up and I was bent over at the waist with my hands on the bed. My legs were gangly and wobbly but I was standing. Holy shit, I was standing. It only lasted a couple of seconds before I plunged down to the bed. Erica walked in and screamed. Either she wasn’t expecting me to be on the bed or was aghast at how awful I look naked.
It seems kind of bizarre to congratulate someone but later I had an long text with Da Olda Sista and she did just that. It's been a long time since The Weirdness Parade has whirred by. But a Dichotomous Day like today is a great way to get it revved up again.
Besides the monetary issue is the side effects issue which I have spoken about previously. That brings us to where we are now. One of the weirdest side effects is my propensity to sit on the side of the bed. I sleep on the left side of the bed and two or three times a night I wake up and find myself perc with my legs on the floor my ass on the bed. Every once in a while I will wake up while trying to prop myself up in. We switched up the drugs a couple weeks ago and I went a few days without his behavior. Unfortunately it didn’t last long enough. We dropped another drug, replaced one or something, I’m not sure, and now I’m back to it.
Yeah? So what?
The first day I was out of the hospital and back home, I fell off the bed. It was the bad math of silk shorts on a silk comforter that slid me off. Forward to New Year’s 2025 and I had no further tumbles. The first week of January I fell off and then again about 10 days ago. One of those times I had dreamt I was trying to skate. Oh my how my dreams convinced me it was real so I attempted standing but only succeeded in falling. Poor Erica was there both times as I assured her these were anomalies. Things went back to normal until last night.
Again if by some dark spirit I found myself sitting on the edge of the bed. In my dream state I dropped several things on the ground. In real life I’ve been going to pick it up and as you would expect...ain't nothing there. In another dream I was kneeling down petting some adorable puppies. Later I was propped up at the edge of the bed (both in the real & dream state). While dreaming I stood up off the picnic table where I weas petting the pups. Stupidly I tried to do the same in the real world. My hips got off my bed but the weight of my bulbous head plugged me directly to the floor. Crack! The sound of my skull hitting the carpet freaked Erica and I awake.
'Man alive', I thought 'I have really fucked myself up this time'. I grabbed my forehead and it was wet but it was not blood. Erica did what Erica do. She freaked out and ran in circles . I try to take account of my faculties and everything was fine. Erica’s took a few minutes freaking before comforting me . She left to get a washcloth so i decided to try & get back on the bed. I push myself up with both hands and made it to Kneeling position, left leg up right knee kneeling (thinks Colin Kapernick) position. I push down on the bed with all my might and was able tom force my left my right leg under me. I pushed as hard as I could and for the first time since August of last year, found myself sstanding up kinda. My legs are straight up and I was bent over at the waist with my hands on the bed. My legs were gangly and wobbly but I was standing. Holy shit, I was standing. It only lasted a couple of seconds before I plunged down to the bed. Erica walked in and screamed. Either she wasn’t expecting me to be on the bed or was aghast at how awful I look naked.
It seems kind of bizarre to congratulate someone but later I had an long text with Da Olda Sista and she did just that. It's been a long time since The Weirdness Parade has whirred by. But a Dichotomous Day like today is a great way to get it revved up again.
